Wow, den muß ich sehen (oder doch nicht?) ... aber bestimmt nicht aus den Gründen, die sich der Verleih vorstellt ... Extrem-Trash-Alarm!!! 😁
Eine Special Forces Einheit mitsamt Taucher im Wald, ein Bösewicht mit dem Namen Cotton Mouth Joe, Casper van Dien ... enough said
So, uhhh, that was Skeleton Man.
Originally given the dreadful title of Cotton Mouth Joe, Nu Image’s retitled Skeleton Man was originally to be released in the States in March of last year. March obviously came and went with no Skeleton Man in sight. One year later, without even so much as a one-sentence preview from any mainstream media outlet, Skeleton Man premiered on the Sci-Fi Channel.
Watching a movie on the Sci-Fi Channel is usually a chore. Sometimes it’s because they’re horrible. Okay, that’s the case most of the time. Other times, good movies are just disturbed by commercials and long sequences that a fast forward button would no doubt help, as was the case with above average entries like Dragon Fighter and Larva.
Sitting through Skeleton Man wasn’t a chore, though. It was a fucking blast. When the credits rolled, I wanted more. Because over that two hour period, I nearly busted a gut laughing at the absurdity of the entire production. If you thought Raptor Island was ridiculous, just wait until you see Skeleton Man.
Years back, a Native American named Cotton Mouth Joe randomly went on a killing spree, murdering most, if not all, of his tribe in a particularly graphic slaughter. Now, inexplicably, he’s back. Only now, he’s got an unbelievably fake bare skull for a head and wears a big cloak.
After military groups have disappeared in a desolate forest that Cotton Mouth Joe rides through, the Army sends in an undercover team, including members of the nonexistent Delta Force (Michael Rooker and Casper Van Dien). Their orders are to care of this nuisance by any means necessary. For whatever reason, the Army also sent along a team of soldiers that include a diving specialist. A diving specialist. On land. Never once do we see a lake in Skeleton Man. That’s a good indication of what you’re in for.
From there, Skeleton Man turns into a routine slasher flick. Or when you consider that this was produced by Nu Image, about as routine as a slasher flick produced by those shlocksters can be. So of course there’s plenty of guns being fired, a helicopter being taken down in the cheesiest way conceivable, and a wholly unnecessary flashback scene from Rooker that had to have been comprised of stock footage.
Naturally, Cotton Mouth Joe doesn’t have a problem with much of the crew. After all, he’s not certainly not at a loss for power. He’s able to teleport himself around the woods that he lurks. Later, we also learn that he’s telepathic, making it two feats that don’t make sense then, and never will. We learn quickly at the beginning of the film that not only is Cotton Mouth Joe eternal, but his cloak is as well, as it accompanies him out of a fire unharmed.
As you can imagine, Skeleton Man is a mess. It’s so bad at points that you can just imagine “Mystery Science Theater 4000” tearing this apart sometime in the future. If there’s anything to give praise about, it’s the fact that director Johnny Martin doesn’t scoff at the idea of using suitable amounts of the red stuff. I swear to God, I cheered during that aforementioned slaughter scene.
Unfortunately, Martin also seems to be incompetent in certain areas. The man apparently hated how Skeleton Man turned out, and wanted his name to be taken off the film, although that is just a rumor considering his name remains on the finished product. There’s a lot of ugly shots here courtesy of Martin, a long time stuntman and first time director, which makes me believe that Nu Image shouldn’t get tossed all the blame for how this turned out.
If you want to have a good laugh, you must rent Skeleton Man when it comes to DVD.
Und der Slogan "hier lebt der Geist von Ed Wood weiter" auf dem Cover ... was haben sich die Jungs vom Verleih dabei nur gedacht?! 🤦♂️ Köstlich! 🤣
